“Asel, you simply must come along. Robbie’s bought Spayne, and he wants us all to go and see...”

It’s a truly splendid day. With Asel’s marriage to the lovely Loreli, the two great Houses of Christler-Coke and Pepsicoma-Dodge will swallow all of America East.

Ducky-Du Pontiac Heinz has other ideas. With help from the wily scion of Disney-Dow, choppers descend on Iacola Keep in a hostile takeover that brings both families to ruin. Banished to The National Executive Rehabilitation Center (NERF) in Oklahomer, Asel learns he has to dress himself, eat bad food, and wear Polly Hester suits.

Escaping with imprisoned noble Sylvan Lee McCree of Dixied-DataDog, Asel discovers an America he never imagined in his darkest dreams...

There are enough bizarre characters in Prince of Christler-Coke to make Asel’s tour of the West hazardous at best...Phil, the mechanical bear, Al, the last of the Utes, evil Nones of Our Lady of Reluctant Desire (OLORD), a city full of robot gamblers, and Asel’s arch nemesis, the vile Jackie Cee, Lord of Califoggy State, ruler of Sekwoyah Heights.